Okay, I get it. Not everyone loves the holidays. Not everyone enjoys hanging out with their family. In fact, some people cannot even with the holidays because they’ve successfully managed to more or less escape the pandemonium and strife of the families they came from, and having to go back during the holidays is stressful.
Friends, I see you — and your relative nightmare. This mildly inappropriate earworm is for you.
I have another parody for you to help get through today’s hectic silliness if you are, like me, handling last-minute stuff. You might have seen it already, but it’s always worth another couple of minutes out of your day. So get yourself a cup of Earl Gray, hot, and click on this video.
They must have read my previous posts about their asinine merchandise (here and here) and decided to pull back on the cray-cray this year. But, of course, such habits die hard, and on my recent trip to Los Angeles, I found a few items to still make us gigglesnort at their inanity with relief that the business of creating overpriced chindogu for bored air passengers* is still alive and kicking its elevator-shoe-clad feet.
Sarah Warburton has provided commentary on these items, too, for your edification.
Seriously? Does anyone actually grill in the dark, in the middle of the night? That’s some serious cravings, dude. Are you living with a vegan** or something?
The catalog text reads, “Turn your pool into an enchanting Venetian canal.”
I guarantee it won’t do that.
And finally, continuing the SkyMall catalog’s curators’ unusual squirrel fetish…
Squirrel Tree Climber
Because nothing says class like a weird animal sculpture. SkyMall specializes in these.
* I am dismayed by the diminishing number of passengers I see reading every time I get on an airplane. To quote Handy and The Human Ton, “Read a book!” Like mine, which is coming out in August. (See what I did there? The requisite Shameless Self-Promotion Every Author Must Do, yet buried, hopefully in good taste, in a footnote.)
** Nothing against vegans. I genuinely admire their resolve and commitment to social and ecological responsibility, especially when they don’t browbeat meat-eaters for not being vegan, too.
Straight No Chaser may be the first a cappella group to have signed with a major recording label. These guys started singing together in college back in the 90s and have been doing it ever since. They’ve managed to make a career out of singing, even all these years later. And next month, one of these guys (Mike) is going to become my cousin-in-law when he marries my cousin Zoë. Yay! They make an adorable couple.
This video is how she introduced him to the family — well, those of us in the extended family who didn’t live in the same part of the country as they did. (That includes me.)
If you’ve been keeping up with this series, thank you. Happiest of holidays. 🙂